Unlearning “I’m Not Enough”

Shame is sneaky. It’s that quiet, familiar voice whispering, “You’re not good enough,” or “Who do you think you are?” Unlike guilt, which says, “I did something wrong,” shame insists, “I am something wrong.” And honestly, that belief can burrow deep, shaping how we see ourselves, connect with others, and handle life’s bumps.

Most of us don’t pick up shame on purpose. It often starts early, in moments when love felt conditional, when criticism outweighed comfort, or when perfection seemed safer than being human. Over time, we internalise those messages and learn to hide our “unacceptable” parts, just to feel safe.

In therapy, we explore these old patterns with curiosity (and the occasional eye-roll at how bossy our inner critic can be). It’s not about blame, it’s about gently bringing those hidden parts into the light, reminding them they’re worthy of care. Together, we practise replacing judgment with compassion, learning to say, “I am human, not broken.”

Healing shame takes time, safety, and a healthy dose of kindness. But it’s absolutely possible.

🌼 Because shame can’t survive being spoken, especially in a space of empathy and connection.

~ Jumbled Bean